WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHURCH SPLITS; HOPEFULLY

If you have lived very long, unfortunately you may have lived through a church split. If you have you will understand the emotional turmoil that immediately exists within each and every person within the congregation involved.  It's like a death of sorts, it's like a divorce, it's confusing and hurtful and scary for all involved.

When a congregation my husband and I were attending had a major event that caused a split I was out of town and got the news that led to the split in a very ugly way; the event in question was merely listed as one of the things to pray for in an e-mail prayer request.  It was a major shock, it was unbelievable, it was NOT a way one wants to find out their church family is headed for disaster!  My first reaction was disbelief, my second was to call someone to find out what happened, my third was to pray.  A little backwards I'd say...perhaps prayer should have been first.  It would have calmed my soul a little, it would have helped me center and think more clearly, and it would have prepared me much better for events that followed!

Psalm 107:28-30 Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. He made the storm be still, and the waves of the sea were hushed. Then they were glad that the waters were quiet, and he brought them to their desired haven

There are as many reasons congregations split as there are sins in the world, and, for this writing it

isn't about the actual EVENT that caused our congregation to split.  (not only would it be gossip if I mentioned it, but it would cause further harm to some very heart and soul sore members of a family that is trying to mend...no matter where they may be right now) What matters is understanding what to do, how to be, how to act in the aftermath of a family that has been torn apart.

Feelings first...well, we know a lot of people are hurting, no matter what they believe happened, so it is important to remember the words in I Peter 4:8-11  Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.  Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.  Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.  If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen."

I said feelings first, because we are human beings that feel a certain way no matter what the event or the words or the wisp of wind in the air causes within us...we are going to FEEL a certain way after events occur that lead to a church split.  It's OK to have feelings about it...it's OK to feel hurt or angry or afraid or unsure, it's NATURAL to have whatever feelings that come!!  Let that happen, let yourself feel what you feel, because that is the very beginning of truth; the best place to start!  And then you PRAY, you pray hard! PRAY before you react, pray during your reactions, pray after you hear things, pray when you feel ANYTHING you feel...let GOD be your guide in everything!

After I prayed (which should have been FIRST) sigh..., anyway, after I prayed I immediately went to (called) an elder to ask questions.  I couldn't wait the 9 days before I returned home to find out what had happened that was most surely going to be the death of the church family (as it was) I had known and loved. He told me some things, but not all, and so I felt tortured for all of those days to wait until I returned home to try to understand what happened and why things were done the way they were. A VERY long 9 days I'll tell you!! 

A very important thing to keep in mind when events occur that cause your congregation to divide itself is NOT TO BE PART OF THE PROBLEM!!  Taking sides is a natural inclination, and it is RIGHT...WHEN the side is GOD. There is always THE right way, and that is the way of truth and our Lord...He gave us the rights and wrongs for our guidance, and in THAT we can feel confident. Proverbs 14:26 In the fear of the Lord one has strong confidence, and his children will have a refuge.



One thing that is critical IF healing of anyone is to occur is that there be transparency within the leadership of the congregation.  COMPLETE AND UTTER TRANSPARENCY!!!

What has happened is VERY PUBLIC, and it happened to every man, woman and child in the congregation.  It happened to the FAMILY within, and, as in our earthly families, when something so drastic happens that causes a split TRANSPARENCY is essential!  IF that does not occur, fear, confusion, anger, and every negative emotion that can be imagined will continue to exist. 

The second thing that should happen is the leadership has the task of ministering to each and every soul that lives within that church family THE WAY THAT SOUL NEEDS!  IF an eldership makes a decision that impacts a church family, they need to take responsibility and help each soul impacted the way THAT SOUL NEEDS IT!!
Liken it to a teacher.  A teacher is given the task of teaching each student that they are in charge of, THE WAY THE STUDENT LEARNS!  I was a teacher, and I know the task is not always easy, but those parents expect their child to learn, that school district expects that I will help each child learn, and EACH CHILD deserves a chance to learn and grow...In just the same manner, our leaders within each congregation are responsible for each and every soul within that congregation, and IF a decision they make (which is sometimes the case) results in  a church division, then they have a very heavy responsibility! IF these two things don't occur, it will not be a healing situation for all involved.

SO, what to do when your church splits? FIRST and foremost, PRAY. Pray for the situation, for the individuals at the crux of the matter, for the reactions of everyone, for the leadership; that they handle it GOD'S WAY, for every aspect of the situation. Let God be in the center of any decision you will make. 

CONSIDERATIONS:  The main consideration when you are deciding the right thing to DO in the aftermath of an event is to stand for truth!  IF your leadership is handling things in a Godly way, work with them to be part of the solution to healing.  Let them do what they need to do to heal and help the members move past the event. Help in any way you can!

IF you find yourself in a situation where you feel your leadership is not handling things in a Godly way, or have actually been a part of the problem, you then have a decision to make. YOUR SOUL is under their guidance.  YOU HAVE TO TRUST YOUR ELDERSHIP with your soul.  If you cannot do that, then you may have to make the hard decision to find another congregation with an eldership you can prayerfully and with trust, put yourself under.

A second consideration is how to love the other members of your once whole family congregation.   Think of an earthly family.  When a family splits up you don't stop loving your other family members.  Some may not be walking the way they should, but you still love them!  LOVE THEM!!  Continue to pray for them, with them...Make wise decisions to NOT be a hindrance to healing on either "side" of the split!  Recognize that every soul in the damaged congregation has a Godly right to decide for themselves what they need to do.  Respect their decisions.  We are all still free moral agents.  God set that in motion, and who are we to try to force anything on anyone!  IF we see blatant sin existing in a church family we are still bound by scripture and given clear instruction as to how to handle it...FOLLOW the scripture on any given situation.   

It's horrible to be a part of a church split.  It grieves our Lord to see disunity within His children.  It is sad, but we can find comfort in the fact that God is still here for all of us.  He gives us guidance for every situation we may find ourselves in.  He is our champion!  HE LOVES US ALL!! Find comfort, Love each other, Respect the right things and you will be OK. 

GOD BLESS!
 
 

FRIENDSHIPS GOD'S WAY

There is a radio station I listen to in the mornings. The DJ's make a show once a year about how they go through their list of friends and "weed".  They actually sit back and decide what is healthy for them and what is no longer healthy as far as friends go.  I used to think it was callous and rude, but after living the life like we all do I have come to believe that we need to take our friendships and relationships more seriously.  Girls, do we spend more time and care thinking about what we may "weed" from our closets than what kind of friendships we have?  (sorry guys, I just HAD to make that comparison!)  We need to ask ourselves questions about people in our lives.  Things like, "Does this person help me in my Christian walk?", "Am I good for this person?", "Is this relationship beneficial to each of us?.  Think of questions you might ask yourself to take stock of the friendships you hold in your lives right now...WHAT kind of friendships are they? What is happening within the relationship?

Before we can think about anything else it might be beneficial to take a practical look at the types of "friendships" that exist. I put quotes around this word "friendships" because we all know that a "good" and healthy friendship is based upon mutual interests, but there are two other types that aren't quite the same.  The first type of friendship is a mutual friendship. If we have things in common with a person we are naturally drawn to that person, and visa versa. That is a BEGINNING.  Similarities in other things play into this as well. It is helpful and beneficial  and important if two people are of like mind and are of similar maturity levels. These factors are important to keep a mutual friendship healthy and happy!  These types of friendships take time to develop; they aren't made complete over night. Once similar interests are discovered it is very important to develop the relationship slowly as the two people learn more of each other and "work" together within the framework of the new friendship.  This is a joyful experience, and folks, rather rare. So take your time with a new friend and allow it to grow naturally.  I see the framework of a healthy mutual friendship in Amos 3:3 "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"

Other types of "friendships" have different characteristics. There is a mentoring friendship. This is where one friend has a bit more maturity and is helping another in times of need with wisdom and knowledge that may be of help to a less experienced, less knowledgeable person. These types of friendships are important for people at different stages in their lives, for BOTH parties. It gives the one being mentored a chance to benefit from the knowledge and experience of the more "mature" person, and it helps the mentor in the relationship to use what they have learned to help another person. Philippians 2:4 " do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." So we learn that it is important to help.  It is also important to note that a mentoring friendship is not the same as a mutual friendship. We must take care within this relationship to understand that the mentor will need to take care of themselves and make sure their balance of life is kept in tact. We all need a rest now and then! Clear boundaries are important within this relationship so the benefits can continue for both parties. It is also important to note that as a mentor IF you have given a mentee everything you have be HONEST with the mentee. If the need is still there and you have nothing else to give you may need to suggest they should seek help from another mentor or seek professional counseling.  This is a loving action.

The third type of friendship is the mentee. This is the person seeking counsel or help from the mentor.  This relationship is important so that a less knowledgeable or person needing help can learn from the one who is a little further down the road in experience, wisdom, or knowledge. It can be a very rewarding experience. We have all most likely been in a situation at a job for example where one who has been there longer can help us learn from their experiences and knowledge. It is important that the mentee realizes that their needs may be overwhelming at times and to understand that the mentor has a life beyond the needs he or she may be experiencing. It is hard to be in a situation where you are needing help. Practical or personal issues can be difficult to wade through at times. The mentee needs to take time to put into action the suggestions of the mentor.  The mentee/mentor relationship can quickly become out of balance if there are only entreaties of need without any effort on the part of the mentee to take advantage of the knowledge and wisdom of the mentor. Everyone has needs and times of being "needy" in life, but we must recognize that this relationship is not a mutual friendship born from mutual interests and similar maturities...this relationship CAN grow to a mutual friendship, but that can not happen until the mentee has learned and grown to a similar place.  It might not ever get there, but the relationship can be a good one if healthy boundaries are kept within the mentor/mentee relationship, or the two individuals find themselves in similar places at some point.  Again, this is not a process that happens over night.

Also important to note for a mentee that if your needs happen to be very encompassing at the moment you may want to find a few mentors of like mind so as not to find yourself in a situation of need and your mentor not available.  It is also a biblical wisdom as found in Proverbs 15:22 "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed." Be sure in this situation to be taking advantage of the knowledge and wisdom you have been given and not just moving from house to house with your need. 

 Now, within these frameworks what does God expect of us in our relationships or friendships? There are many scriptures regarding our relationships with each other, so let's just look at a few that might help wade through our responsibilities to each other and ourselves as God would have it.

A great place to start is found in John 15:13 "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." This would indicate a sacrificial type of love for each other.  I can see this in each of the relationships above.  Within this sacrificial type of love we need to employ love of each other and not take advantage of each other on either side of the coin.  Mutual respect can and should exist within the framework of each of these relationships for them to continue in a healthy way!

Jesus tells us the framework that makes us His friends...what can we learn and apply to each us in the above relationships? John 15:14 "You are my friends if you do what I command." and NO, we don't get to boss each other around...think hard about this one!!


Look at the wisdoms within Proverbs...

Proverbs 17:17 "A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need." our job is not to take advantage of a loyal friend, but to accept help, when needed, with grace and gratitude.  On any given day we can be on either side of this line!

Proverbs 27:6 "Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." If you are lucky enough to have a trusted friend or mentor, understand that some things said may not be easy to hear. II Timothy 3:16 is a good measure to remember when we are searching for Godly wisdom "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,"

Proverbs 27:17 "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." If we have the right attitude within any of the types of friendships discussed above, this is a blessing! IF we take "sharpening" with the right attitude this means we have the choice to grow!

Proverbs 18:24 "A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother."

I encourage you to take some time to evaluate your relationships in life...if you have a mutual friend, REJOICE, if not, let time wisdom guide you in that direction.  If you are a mentor or a mentee, take heed...do not take advantage of the other.  If your lines are fuzzy and you don't know what kind of relationship you are in, read through this again (I didn't make it up, I studied the topic) and see if you can clarify your lines and set boundaries so the relationships can be healthy and Godly!

GOD BLESS!

INTEGRITY AND BEING A CHRISTIAN

This concept of integrity has been on my mind and heart lately.  Questions about what it really means and how it applies in our lives as Christians. I began to study things related; I began to ponder who I've known that displayed integrity, or what I thought was integrity. I invite you all to give this some thought. It has been an interesting study.

Being a teacher I tend to follow a pattern when I study a subject. I look for definitions that we all can relate to. I look for background on a subject. I look for applications within the scope of my subject of study.  So, following my pattern, I looked for the worldly definition of this word integrity...

Wikipedia refers to integrity as a concept of consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations, and outcomes. In ethics, integrity is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one's actions.  And further, The word "integrity" stems from the Latin adjective integer (whole, complete). In this context, integrity is the inner sense of "wholeness" deriving from qualities such as honesty and consistency of character. As such, one may judge that others "have integrity" to the extent that they act according to the good values, beliefs and principles they claim to hold. and then...

 

In the Bible, the Hebrew word translated “integrity” in the Old Testament means “the condition of being without blemish, completeness, perfection, sincerity, soundness, uprightness, wholeness.” Integrity in the New Testament means “honesty and adherence to a pattern of good works.”

 

I then looked for application of this concept of integrity in the scriptures and found quite a bit, but in Proverbs and Titus the biblical wisdoms spoke the loudest to me...consider the following scriptures

Proverbs 10:9 Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who

makes his ways crooked will be found out.  This tells me that integrity is secure and the opposite of dishonesty.

Proverbs 11:3 The integrity of the upright guides them, but the crookedness of the treacherous destroys them. I see here that the character displayed through a heart guided by integrity can keep us from destruction.

Proverbs 28:18 Whoever walks in integrity will be delivered, but he who is crooked in his ways will suddenly fall. I understand that those without integrity; honesty and good moral character; will fall.

 

And, finally, for this study we see in Titus 2:7-8 Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.  Does that mean that some will never have anything evil to say about us? No, we know that evil and gossip is often a way some use to hurt us...but, it DOES mean that our good moral character, our credibility, our INTEGRITY will be such that there will be no proof behind the evil attacks. In this we can feel confidant.

 

I'm learning already that to be a Christian that displays what God asks we are to have integrity in our lives...or, more accurately BE a man or woman of integrity, because I've come to understand that integrity is not something we can put on and take off. Integrity is what we are, not what we do. It is our good moral code.

 

 

Jesus was our perfect example of one with PERFECT integrity. He is our example. We will not be perfect, but we know who we look to.

Spend some time to reflect on those in our lives who are men and women of integrity. They are easy to spot now that you know what to look for. They are people who are honest and have good moral character. They are consistent in that character. They are often ones who are lied about, attacked and gossiped about. They are ones who stand for truth in spite of heavy ridicule. They are Christians that do not strike back when they have a worldly right to. They are ones that love and respect themselves enough to know who they follow and not let the ugliness of others to cause them to loose that integrity that IS who they are.

So, when we who are not perfect like our Lord are considering what we aspire to, let us consider that word integrity, and understand the God that blessed us with a choice of what we can be.

 

GOD BLESS!

DIVISIVINESS and CHRIST'S CHURCH

Titus 3:10 - "Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that have nothing to do with them." 

What does divisive mean? Simply, it means those who create dissension or discord. Why is this such a destructive force? Simply, it DIVIDES people.  When a church is called to unity, this is the opposite behavior.  Unity is a big topic in the words that God left for Christians to follow.  It was a problem in some churches in the 1st century.  It is a problem in our church today.  Take some time to read the scriptures on unity.  Guard your hearts against a divisive person who destroys unity.  They are there.  They are wolves in sheep's clothing.  Matthew 7:15 - "Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves".  Wolves seek to separate and kill their prey.  Wolves seek to divide.  This is their nature. 

I Corinthians 1:10; Ephesians 4: 1-6; John 17:21; Philippians 2:3; Amos 3:3; Ephesians 4:3; II Corinthians 7:1; well, you get the idea...there is MUCH about unity!

 

What kinds of things do divisive people do to divide a group, and what are some reasons they may want to do this?  BIG QUESTIONS! There are probably as many answers to this question as their are people who divide, but if we look at the purest motives it would seem that selfishness is at the root of all of it.  James 3:14-16 - "But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice." They want what THEY want.  They seek to either obviously or, worse, subversively get their way.  This can be through gossip, Ephesians 4:29 - "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." through false kindness to others with the intent to "win" their victim over to "their side", they may even try to blackmail others in a way to "force" their "WAY" on to others...as I said the list can be endless. 

What do we do beyond having nothing to do with a divisive person.  One who seeks to live in dark places in their heart?  Ephesians 5:11 - "Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them." Read vs. 1-11...get a picture of what God wants of us as His children.  Exposing darkness in behaviors of others who seek to divide and conquer; exposing the divisive; is important in order for unity to be reestablished.  God was clear on these things. 

And, though this topic covered is in NO way all inclusive, one final thought for this is to remember our motivations when we work to eliminate divisive people, and darkness within our midst, is our true motive should be LOVE.  Love of the brethren, Love of our Lord, Love of His words, Love of ourselves in what kind of Godly person we strive to be.  However folks, LOVE is not weak, and it sometimes looks harsh.  Confused about this part?  Think of when you discipline your children...

 

GOD BLESS

A BALANCED LIFE GOD'S WAY

This has been a year for the books in our whole family. Actually it's been a few years since things seemed "normal" in our family.  It began with the diagnosis of Parkinson's for my father.  Dad had Leukemia for over 12 years.  He and mom had fallen into a routine of care; using Doug Kauffman and other doctors who had moved through main stream medicine to a more healthy way of life through diet and other types of healhy alternatives to main stream things like chemo and the like.  It had helped dad for many years...He worked as an attorney; assistant Attorney General until a mere couple of months before he died from Lymphoma.  He and mom fought a great fight; together they made the best of what was not the best situation.  It was them and God, a great example!

Until dad was diagnosed with Parkinson's it never really dawned on me that a person could have more than one horrible disease.  I know, but that is the way my brain works in these matters.  And, after the Parkinson's on top of the Leukemia there was the Lymphoma. I don't hold much stock in time frames; mainly because my brain works on events in life rather than WHEN it occurred.  I don't know how long dad lived with the last two horrible things. A year? sigh...The point is he and mom handled it together beautifully, considering what they had to walk through. They got to stay together for nearly 50 years, and home together all the way til dad went home to heaven.  I am glad they got such a long time together; which really is so short in the grand scheme of things.  Still, longer than so many have together. Much longer than I will get with my husband as we married later in life.  Such is the way things go. This bothers me though, that my time with my husband is way shorter than I wish. This is my brain.  It has been a good thing, however, because I see so clearly and live now so clearly what God expects of me; that my husband be first only after God. 

These events began a different life for all of us.  Each person in the family has had a change in some way.  A change of routine, a change in the way we think or feel about things, a change in our interactions with each other, and the world at large really.  These changes are harder on some of us than others.  Such is life and the differences in each one of us. 

("Family Dynamics" Elizabeth Seaver; a blogger friend)



It is in this change that I began to be truly introduced to the concept of BALANCE.  It's always been there; this balance thing.  It's always been a part of life...but, it wasn't until my father died that I began to be intimately acquainted with it; and understand life doesn't work well without it.  It's been chasing me around for many months now, and has, I believe, finally caught up with me.  This BALANCE thing demands of me, and if I don't give it what it wants, I will loose my effectiviness in many areas of life.  I found these two photos demonstrating balance...one seems calmer and more in line with what we would want; see if you can choose the one that I'm talking about. One side works...it fills the space with serenity, where the other looks as if it is about to topple over.  Both are balanced, but one looks as if one more thing were to be added the whole world would topple.  I've been living the one on the right...SCARY!

Ephesians 3:1-8 is a passage that is familiar, but about setting up a balanced life.  "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
³ a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
⁴ a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
⁵ a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
⁶ a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
⁷ a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
⁸ a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace."  AND so, if there is a time for everything, then there must be a way to balance it all.  It only makes sense!

How do we find this Godly balance?  Well, Matthew 6:33-34 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Sounds like a good place to start every day!  And, that is what I began to do in earnest.  I woke up everyday praying that I have wisdom for the day, praying for everyone in my family that was hurting from this loss, praying, praying, praying...and thanking God that I KNEW He was there...and IS there. 

So, FINDING balance can be hard; we can be blown about by every wind at first if we aren't

prepared with our Godly armor.  There are many comforting scriptures I found that deal with this idea of balance.  I hope you can take the time to read them and find what God is trying to give you in each one.  II Peter 3:17 tells us not to be carried away with the error of lawless people; Phil. 4:8 tells us what to think on; Hebrews 13:5 and Phil. 4:11 tells us to be content with what we have; I Peter 5:7 tells us to cast our anxieties on God (helps when we are overwhelmed with life); Ephesians 5:15 tells us to walk as wise, and we know we can have Godly wisdom if we only ask - James 1:5; I Peter 5:8 tells us to be sober minded in order to watch out for the devil.  All these things will help us in our search for the balance in our lives that will make our lives the best they could be!   Study and prayer...our way to be close to God.  And, God is our only way to have the best kind of BALANCE.

My dad has been gone for nearly a year, and I miss him still, SO MUCH.  I still feel a stab in my heart when I think of him, I still cry at the most unexpected of times, I've NEVER noticed just how many holidays we really have until I began to count the "first holidays" since he died.  It sometimes feels like it will never end, and then, on the other hand, it feels like time is moving too quickly...there is MUCH I want to do and be before it is my turn to go to heaven...See how my life began to be out of balance?  See how I came to this post about how to find balance?  

I haven't totally gotten there yet; I am still struggling, but I'm on the right path, I'm going to get there if I keep my eyes on heaven and what my God has asked of me...That's the only way...I hope you can begin to find that Godly balance that will make your life here AWESOME!

GOD BLESS!!

DOES GOD HEAR SINNERS?...A STUDY ON STUDYING THE TRUTH

Recently in a bible class I attended, the question arose that has bounced around forever; does God hear the prayers of a sinner?  At first the answer seemed to be yes, and then it seemed no.  We talked about it for awhile and finally came to the conclusion that more study on the subject was needed.

As I said, this topic has been discussed and RE discussed over the years with no solid clarity for so many people. I LOVE to study the bible, but yet I couldn't bring to mind readily the middle part of my previous studies on the matter. My immediate recollection was NO, but...wait there SEEMS to be some contradictory points, thus necessitating more study. By the way...STUDY as defined in the on-line dictionary (remember when we said the Websters Dictionary? oops I digress) - 1. The pursuit of knowledge, as by reading, observation, or research. 2. Attentive scrutiny. II Timothy 2:15 says  "Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman who needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." Yep, it says rightly dividing. It is SO important that we are constantly in the word to RIGHTLY come to the answer.

John 9:31 - "We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly person who does His will."  This was the first scripture brought up in our bible class.  At first glance it would seem that our answer is clear, but upon further study and, yes, a trip to the church to talk to our preacher; I was reminded that one important part of studying the bible is not only to make sure of the proper context, but to find out WHO said what we read.  The Pharisees were questioning the blind man that Jesus healed in the passage...trying to find out if Jesus had done some work on the Sabbath (REALLY trying to discredit Him...as always!); which would have "proven" to everyone that He couldn't be from God if he broke one of the laws of the Sabbath....sigh. It was the Pharisees that said the statement in John 9:31.  This does not make the verse untrue, it makes it a statement the Pharisees said to try to bring doubt to the people around...again...to discredit Jesus... (Remember, what makes a good deception is that it has roots in truth) To find the complete answer it is important to study further than one verse, that could easily have been pulled out of context.

The RIGHT question to ask in light of all of this is does God ANSWER the prayers of sinners? Why this? Well, it would be a contradictory thing if we just went with John 9:31.  The natural question to arise is what about Cornelius? Cornelius was a Gentile who was devout in his pursuit of God as a Gentile, Acts 10:2, but he was not a baptized Christian.  Read the account of Cornelius conversion in Acts 10.  It is clear that Cornelius's prayer was heard because vs. 4 says of an angel in a vision he had "And when he observed him, he was afraid and said. "What is it lord? So he (the angel) said to him, "Your prayers and your alms have come up for a memorial before God" We know that God heard Cornelius who was searching after Him. We know that God watches over us all; Psalm 33:13 - "When the LORD looks down from heaven, he observes every human being." and we know that God wants everyone to come to Him and be saved. I Timothy 2:3-4 - "This is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior, ⁴ who desires all men to be saved and to come to the ^[a]knowledge of the truth." (the good and acceptable in this verse refers to Paul's exhortation to Timothy that prayers and such be made for all men, including kings and those in authority).
II Peter 3:9 - " The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." So, the short of this story is God; who knows all things and sees all things, sent Peter to baptize Cornelius and his household.

These two seemingly conflicting parts of the bible caused the deeper study on whether God hears or answers sinners.  In I John 3:22 - "And receive from Him anything we ask, because we keep His commands and do what pleases Him" we learn that to have our answered prayers from God we need to keep His commandments...we do what He says...and one of those things is to become a Christian, and we do that at the point of baptism. (Acts 2:38). I John 5: 14-15 - "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of Him." And, so, the key to the answer of our question at hand is that God hears all, He wishes that no man should perish, and He answers those who do His will, those who ASK according to His will.

It is often brought up "What about the thief on the cross"...my preacher was kind enough to bring even more clarity on this matter that helped tremendously! Thanks Rick!... People have said..."The thief on the cross got to go to heaven and he wasn't baptized, he had his entreaty answered without doing what God asked of him"...WELL...let's look at

1. Matthew 3:5-6 - "People went out to him from Jerusalem and all Judea and the whole region of the Jordan. ⁶ Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River." The question to ask ourselves here is "How do we know he wasn't baptized?" and then in

2. Mark 2:4-12 is a story about Jesus healing the paralytic man and the Pharisees are once again trying to discredit Him by asking "Who can forgive sins (back then they thought that people with afflictions had to be sinners and this was their punnishment) but God alone?" vs 7.  In verse 10a we have further help in our question about the thief on the cross..."But that ye may know that the Son of man hath power on earth to forgive sins,".  Sinner or not, baptized or not, Jesus had all authority to bring the thief to heaven with Him! and third...

3. Romans 6:3-4 " Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? ⁴ We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life." Jesus hadn't died yet, so the baptism that we know as is our path to salvation today hadn't happened yet.

This only touches the tip of what we need to learn of God on matters like these.  We know we need to study; to get in the Word diligently, and through that we will understand what we need to know to have our place in heaven with Him and to bring as many with us as we can!  Here is more food for thought as we all study more on this subject!

Proverbs 15:29; Proverbs 28:9; Isaiah 1:15; Psalm 145:19; Zechariah 7:13; Proverbs 1:28-29; John 15:16.

GOD BLESS!

PORTRAIT OF A BULLY

Bullying is intentional aggressive behavior. It can be physical or verbal ie. psychological . It can include teasing, harassing, insulting, excluding, gossiping about, hitting, and/or even grabbing someone...IT IS SOMETHING THAT TYPICALLY CONTINUES UNLESS THERE IS INTERVENTION!

We hear a lot about bullies these days...kids that have been mercilessly picked on and abused by other kids to the point sometimes where they are so devastated that they kill themselves. HORRIBLE...it makes me absolutely sick to think of it! When I taught in public school bullying was the number one thing that I just wouldn't tolerate...AT ALL! To see kids picking on someone who they have deemed as less than just really got to me and I put a stop to it IMMEDIATELY! Did you know there is biblical principle for this? Psalm 82:4 " Rescue the weak and the needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.” THAT is what we are supposed to do...not sit quietly, idly by so as not to "cause trouble".

We are all smart enough to know that bullying doesn't stop with kids...it exists in the "adult" world as well.  I feel JUST nearly as strongly about adult bullies as I do kids behaving in such a horrible way with each other. I say nearly because children have NO RECOURSE if they are bullied but to depend on an adult or a brave other young person who might come to their aide...they cannot escape it as easily...BUT bullying is horrible and wrong no matter what the age!

What does God say about such things? Actually a lot, but to avoid an entire book in this post let's just look at a bit of His word and wisdom about people who bully.  Leviticus 19:18: "You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord." OK you haters, you bullies out there...! I John 3:15 - "Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him." and don't get comfortable with yourselves if you think you are safe because you don't HATE the person who has been the object of your bullying...If you are not TRULY loving you are hating...COME ON! and in I John 2:9 - "Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness."  and finally for this moment in time...
Proverbs 6:16-19 - "There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers." I cannot improve on that, but I want to get in the reality of it!

PEOPLE HAVE HEARTS UNDER THE SHELL OF PROTECTION THEY BUILD FOR THEMSELVES!! DO NOT BE GUILTY OF DESTROYING THE GOOD IN ANOTHER PERSON!

 

Have you ever spent time with someone who has been the victim of bullies? Kids or adults; it doesn't matter...there is a common thread in all of them...Eventually you will see in one form or another, ANGER, a REBELLIOUS ATTITUDE, BRAVADO or DEFEATED to the point of GIVING UP, an air of HELPLESSNESS, or AGRESSION. This is the danger. OFTEN the one bullied may become a bully. This happens when the bullied person has had enough. Any animal or creature in God's world that is poked at with a stick long enough will eventually strike back in some way if it doesn't stop. That is why bullying has to be stopped IMMEDIATELY! It can save a person's heart!

 

If you use your voice, your haughty eyes (YES, even a look), your ugly attitude, your disguised jealousy, your false attitude of righteousness to pick at or demean another person you are a BULLY! If this is you then you need to STOP immediately. You need to correct your behavior and in a very transparent way. GO to that person and make it right, use the steps of a good apology discussed in the previous post and make it right! Read Matt. 18, I Cor. 8...it's all in there...and there is MORE if you want to study...there is always more to help us know what is right and good to do!

 

 

 

Did you know that a group of bullies is called a mob? That is bullying that has just gone wild; when that happens INTERVENTION is a most definite course of action...very plain, very clear, very direct INTERVENTION by those who see it, is required! Once the ball of bully is rolling down that hill it is so much harder to stop! Anything BIGGER is more dangerous in this situation! STOP IT! We can't be passive, we have to be proactive!

 

God doesn't approve of this behavior, He HATES it as we read above. He expects us, as His children to be unified (Psalm 133:1, I Cor. 1:10), to love one another, to get along, to not regard any to be lower than us (Phil. 2:3)...we have to stop this mob mentality, this bullying so we can accomplish what He has asked us to do! We know this...it is the practicing of it that gets lost in the translation because we decide for ourselves what WE want, and we do that...Read Psalms 1 and following...here's a bit..."Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so, but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; ...

 

Be that person that resolves to stop this kind of behavior in your world, in your church, in your circle of friends, in your family. If we all do our part MUCH can be accomplished!  Work together for good instead of wrong...be a mob of blessing for someone who has been bullied!

 

GOD BLESS!