DAUGHTER, WIFE, MOTHER...WOMAN
I came into this world a daughter first...I am here because my parents wanted me to be here, and God made me a girl...so, daughter FIRST (in this context; yes, I was a girl first...duh...lol). What does God say about daughters...well...about children...me being one at one time...
Ephesians 6:1-3- "Children, do what your parents tell you. This is only right. 'Honor your father and mother' is the first commandment that has a promise attached to it, namely, 'so you will live well and have a long life'"
Colossians 3:20-"Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord"
Proverbs 1: 8-9 - "Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and do not forsake your mother's teaching; indeed they are a graceful wreath to your head and ornaments about your neck"
Proverbs 23:22 - "Pay attention to your father, and don't neglect your mother when she grows old"
Proverbs 20:11 - "Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right"
Proverbs 8:32-33 - "Now therefore, listen to Me, My children, for blessed are those who keep My ways. Hear instruction and be wise, and do not disdain it"
It's pretty clear that even as we begin on this earth we have a job if you will...a purpose, to learn and grow and listen and eventually DO what we learned from our parents and God's Word.
I didn't and don't always DO what my parents and God want/ed me to...that's normal...and, even as a little one, and later an older, rebellious daughter there were consequences when I went against my parents and my God. We all have those too! Those consequences...whew...
Isaiah 59:2 "But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, and your sins have hidden His face from you so that He does not hear" OUCH!
SO FAR this is pretty straight forward...do what those who are over you, and wiser than you say and it will be better for you...and everyone around you...OK...yep, easier said than done.
Then, MUCH LATER, I became a wife...and, yes, there are scriptures on wives and our responsibilities as well...Read Ephesians5...and Colossians 3. It talks about our responsibilities as wives in the Lord...Godly wives that is. The message is similar...we have someone that is our head, NOT our BOSS...but the hierarchy that God intended...we have a role to preform...to be a help meet: Genesis 2:18. We are given guidelines on what kind of person to be as a wife...I Timothy 3:11 "In the same way, their wives are to be women worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything" (these are guidelines given for wives of deacons I believe)...but...come on girls...who among us would say "Whew, I'm glad those guidelines don't apply to me cuz my hubby isn't a deacon"...we may want to say it sometimes, but get real...yep, that is something good to aspire to as any wife! We are to dress modestly...I Peter 3:3...and there is more...but this is getting LONG!
Did you ever notice that being a wife isn't an easy job? Being a kid isn't always an easy job? For me, it has always been hard to relinquish my OWN self to what I was asked to do. I didn't and still DON'T like to be told what to do. It is HARD for me to let ANYONE have any control over me. Perceived or real...I hate it! I feel like something isn't right. Some of you may not struggle with this, but I had some bad experiences in my life and my first marriage that totally devastated my natural ability to trust another human with ME. It is hard for me, sometimes, to be in the role of a Christian wife. DON'T GET ME WRONG...I can not find any scripture ANYWHERE that says I have to "do what I'm told" by my husband...there is nothing there that says I am LESS THAN my husband. He is NOT my keeper...he is my PARTNER; meaning side by side in the Lord partner...we owe each other subjection in respect to our places with God. Ephesians 5:21 - "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ". I am a DAUGHTER OF THE KING...just as he is also a CHILD OF THE KING...in that we are equal...it's just that someone has to be the king of the castle, and God made it man. Have you ever seen the end result when two cooks insist on their way in a kitchen, or two managers in one office making decisions the way THEY want? Yep, it can get messy...So, someone
BUT, HOWEVER... He also told man how he is to love his wife...SACRIFICIALLY, GIVING UP HIS LIFE for her...and folks that DON'T MEAN DYING FOR as much as LIVING for her...Ephesians 5:25 - "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her". When a man loves his wife in that way, he LEARNS who she is, he STUDIES her, he UNDERSTANDS her heart, and decisions are made with that in mind...and he gives her EQUALITY...and in that what woman wouldn't fall all over herself to be a great wife as God said...that would be easy!! whew...if only it were always that way! HA...but, you get my point....I hope...It's a give and take thing...God never intended for anyone to be a slave...not man nor woman (we can ALL get it wrong folks!)...imagine the crazy cycle if we each were always looking out for number one...
Proverbs 22:6 - "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it". So, we come to our next role in life; MOTHER. Motherhood is THE most REWARDING and EXHAUSTING job I know of. It starts out all happy and exciting when we learn we are to be a mother...and then it is scary when we wonder what it may mean, and then it HURTS to give birth, and then it is EXHAUSTING as we give 100% of ourselves to our new little love of our life for a VERY long time, and then it is heart wrenching as we learn to turn off the protective tiger in us to let them go a little, and then it is even HARDER to let them leave home and find a path of their own...WHEW...talk about a skitsophrenic experience...we are to love like God made us to love and then let go and NOT do everything for them at the same time...WOW, that's why we have a zillion books for parents on this very subject...it is TOUGH stuff to love hard, and then love as our hearts are ripped out of our chests when we miss them so much as they leave...
We are WOMEN!! Through it all we are separate human beings that somehow have to maintain a sense of self in all our roles. Have you ever felt swallowed up in a role? Or in all of your roles? (and we didn't even talk about the subset of roles that are cook, maintenence people, doctors, psychologists, etc, etc, etc!) It seems, from experience, that we sometimes forget about ourselves and what we are separate and apart from all the other roles; roles we may LOVE, but we forget that we are US too. And that my friends is not what God wants! We are GIRLS, we are WOMEN, we have, believe it or not, the SAME RIGHTS as do all the others have in our lives...our husbands, our parents, our children, our everyone else's in our lives...we are soft and pretty and sweet and gentle and needy and strong and, and, and...God loves us too...He made us, also, in His image Genesis 1:27 - "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female He created them." That is AWESOME!...And yet, we so often do not see our own value, or help those in our lives to know we have a value set apart from any role we live in...We are PEOPLE that need to be loved, and nurtured, and asked about, and treated special, and NOT DISRESPECTED (I know my english here is terrible, but I had to throw that one in)...we work HARD all our lives for others, and that is a great blessing we have...but we tend to get lost in the shuffle sometimes...we tend to be treated with disrespect sometimes, we tend to be pushed around sometimes, we tend to be devalued BECAUSE people misinterpret the bible to mean we are less than men, we tend to just lie down and take it BECAUSE we put our roles above our humanity...and I say that is NOT what God intended for us!
So, ladies, I'm not being disrespectful to God when I say...TAKE BACK YOUR ROLE AS A WOMAN!! BE a woman...a separate individual that has many roles, true, but don't FORGET the soft, pretty, wonderful, strong, interesting human that God made in the first place!! Expect respect from those in your life...expect that your children will respect you and ask about you instead of always asking FOR something from you...and do the same with the rest of the people in your life! If someone in your life is toxic, remove them from your life, if someone hurts you, tell them and help them see your value...do not be a rug that people wipe their feet on, instead be the stain glass window that inspires others by the beauty that is even more beautiful with the light shining in...(and this is a perfect time to make the connection with God's light) (Can't you just hear Helen Reddy singing "I am Woman" right about now?) tee hee But as silly and simplistic as this post has been, it has been in my heart for a long time to remind us all of our value! God sees it...so, to respect Him, we need to love what He created!!
GOD BLESS US EVERYONE...as Tiny Tim once said! :)